You've let Kenny die in combat 10 times over the course of the game.
You own all the weapons and costumes available in the game.
You've collected all of the available costumes.
You sold 300 junk items.
You defeated Princess Kenny and recovered the Stick of Truth.
You completed the game and never ended a battle with your buddy knocked out.
You completed the game without selling any items.
You defeated Princess Kenny in your girl makeover disguise.
You defeated Princess Kenny while living with Dire AIDS.
You defeated Princess Kenny while looking like David Hasselhoff.
Everyone in South Park is your friend.
While inside Mr. Slave, you summoned Mr. Slave.
You interrupted 5 channel attacks by using a fart.
You collected all of the Chinpokomon.
You farted on four major authority figures.
You befriended both crab people and gnomes.
You've farted on a dog while in gnome form.
You defeated 20 enemies using Cartman's Ass.
You've spent $500.
You farted on the corpse of an aborted Nazi Zombie fetus.
In three separate battles, you've taken a shit in your pants.
You've farted on every buddy in the game.
You watched your parents have sex for 60 seconds.
You have collected half of the available costume sets.
You defeated the High Jew Elf Kyle in battle.
You defeated the Grand Wizard Cartman in battle.
You knocked out 3 or more enemies with a single fart outside of battle.
You befriended the Goths, like everyone else playing this game.
You made friends with half of South Park.
You opened all of the garages in South Park.
You befriended your father.
You've unlocked all of the upgrades for a New Kid ability.
You collected 15 Chinpokomon.
You completed your first day in South Park.
You have joined the KKK.
Over the course of the game, you've scored 100 perfect attacks.
You defeated the Boss Hall Monitor while wearing freckles.
Gingers have bitten you 3 times without you blocking.
You defeated 3 enemies in one battle while your buddy was knocked out.
You shat your pants during a boss battle.
You farted on 10 enemies in the world that were knocked out.
Over the course of the game, you've blocked 100 attacks.
You've farted on animals 25 times.
You've farted on people 100 times.
You found Jesus while playing as a Jew.
You successfully blocked every enemy attack in a single (non-tutorial) battle.
You defeated the Meth Tweekers while wearing the Evil Cartman goatee and bald cap.
You collected 5 Chinpokomon.
You flung a turd of your own creation at an enemy.
You accepted your fate and chose the name Douchebag yourself.
